January 13, 2008

Alternatives to “Never Trust a Skinny Chef”

I don’t hear people say “Never trust a skinny chef” anymore, maybe because there are so many famous respected skinny chefs. But I still appreciate the intentions of a warning against those who manage to maintain a reasonable weight and yet would dare call themselves culinary experts. So I came up with some equally insightful cautions against questionable members of other professions.

Never Trust a Sober Bartender.

Never Trust a Law-Abiding Cop.

Never Trust a Laissez-Faire Politician.

Never Trust a Healthy Doctor.

Never Trust a Stone-Faced Comedian.

Never Trust a Free-Thinking Teacher.

Never Trust a Muscle-Bound Vegan.

Never Trust an Alive Funeral Director.

Never Trust a Non-Pyromaniac Fire Fighter.

Never Trust a Religious Leader Who Doesn’t Think He’s God.

Never Trust a Non-Chronic Gambler.

Never Trust a Balding Hair-Stylist.

Never Trust a Non-Murderous Gun Maker.

Never Trust a Well-Adjusted Psychologist.

Never Trust a Fat Anorexic.

Comments (View)
blog comments powered by Disqus